Suffolk County's D.A.'s Office: Help for Domestic Violence Victims

WHAT IS DOMESTIC VIOLENCE?

Power and Control
Domestic Violence is a pattern of behavior used by an abuser to maintain power and control over his or her partner. It may include emotional abuse ("put-downs", name-calling, humiliation, mind games, treating the partner like a servant); isolation (limiting the partner's activities outside the relationship, controlling who the partner sees or speaks to and where he or she goes); financial abuse (preventing the partner from getting a job or controlling all the money); threats and intimidation (making the partner feel as though he or she may be physically hurt if the abuser's demands are not satisfied, including displaying weapons, damaging property or hurting pets); and physical violence, including forced sexual relations. Generally, domestic violence begins with non-violent behaviors as the abused partner seeks to pull away from the relationship or assert his or her independence. Once the abuse becomes physical, it generally becomes increasingly violent over time, starting from a slap or a shove and escalating to severe beatings or inuries using weapons, and ultimately, homicide.

The Cycle of Violence
The cycle of violence begins with the tension-building phase, in which tension mounts and culminates in an incident of violence. Often, immediately after the violent episode, the abuser is remorseful and promises that no further violence will occur. It is during this "honeymoon" phase that an abused partner may come to forgive the abuser, believe that it will never happen again, and continue the relationship. This phase may then flow into another tension-building phase culminating in an even more violent event and increasing the risk to the abused partner.

Domestic Violence Unit contents.